What A Boy Wants

What a boy wants, what a boy needs…

DH finally got around to cleaning out “those bins” of junk that have been vexing me since we moved in. Yay!

He found a 10 year old floppy disk with a copy of a document titled “What DO I want?” (in a woman). He was twenty two when he wrote this; lets see how I measure up?

someone daring, who shares my life motto of “try anything once, twice
if you like it”, yet conservative enough to recognize someone’s limits,
and not to push past those limits: check

someone who is caring, who can read my mind when I don’t really know
how I’m feeling, or thinking: D-.

someone who can recognize what I’m going through, and offer genuine
support for my troubles: D-.

someone who has “been there, done that” and can offer practical advice: Well, since I really do know everything.

someone who doesn’t push their opinions on me like they’re the law: You mean he didn’t like it when I told him that the goat-E had to go?

someone who can look into my eyes and understand my moods: The man has two moods; “Good,” and “Fine.” That should be easy enough.

someone whose eyes I can stare into for hours without them asking
“what are you looking at?” OOPS.

someone whose inner beauty outshines their physical appearance: Isn’t that what you say to placate a fat wife? Does he want a fat wife? Wait a minute, am I a fat wife?

someone who laughs at my jokes: I laugh at him when he tries to tell jokes all the time!

someone who can TELL jokes: I got one for ya: “What do you call a cow that has just given birth?”

someone carefree, and loving, and not afraid to get close to me: Where’s my hug?

someone mature enough to take a joke, yet immature enough to be
willing to play one: D-.

someone brave enough to say “yes”, but also brave enough to say “no”,
and being able to tell the difference: Exactly, Yes means No, and No means Yes, except for when No really means: “NOT ON YOUR LIFE, BUDDY.”

someone that can take “no” for an answer: Sure, I’ll take No for an answer the first 19 times, and he’ll eventually cave in and say yes!

someone who can take care of me when I have the sniffles: You mean I’m supposed to do something other than throw a box of tissues at him?

someone who doesn’t whine about the littlest things, like stubbing
their toe: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?

someone who knows enough about what I do at work to share my
excitement and frustrations, but is willing to learn about what I do
when they don’t understand something: Uh, yeah, he like, uh, works on computers or something, and sometimes he makes my Blog pretty.

someone who will let me visit them if they’re baby-sitting, and let me
Help: He doesn’t know this yet, but he’s got Diaper Duty ’til Death Do Us Part

someone strong enough in their relationship with God that they can
teach me a thing or two: Lesson One – 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 – “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body,” AND GET YOUR BOOTY TO THE GYM. AMEN.

someone who can share in the ministry that God has called me into, yet not afraid to ask for support in the areas that God wants to use them. He has an appointment with the recruitment table on Sunday morning

someone willing to pray with me: Especially when he says, “Dear God, Thank you for Elizabeth”

someone willing to pray *for* me, ’cause Lord knows I need it: Check.

someone who likes cats: Sure, I like Cat Scans, and Cat’s Cradle, and Catsup…

someone mature enough in their walk with God that going out with
non-Christian friends doesn’t cause a major stumble: Define “Major” and then we’ll talk

someone who isn’t afraid to tell me when my clothes don’t match, but
isn’t so anal about it that they try to dress me every time they see me: We need to have a little talk about those jeans he’s wearing

someone who doesn’t try to over-analyze everything I say or do: Check.

someone who can give constructive criticism, but knows when to stop: You mean like “Get off your sedentary butt, and go to th.”?

someone who has similar tastes in music, art and movies: Dude, He expects me to like Stevie Wonder – don’t you think he needs to reevaluate his expectations just a little bit?

someone who isn’t afraid to tell me when I’m out-of-line without
sounding like harassment: Check.

someone that can tell a secret and know that they can trust me: Psst!

someone who can *keep* a secret, and assure me they are trustworthy: All the way to my grave!

someone who maintains a sense of faithfulness, foremost to God, then
to family, then to me: Um, you know that whole “I’m mad at God” thing, we need to talk.

I find it especially funny that he had this “want ad” posted on his personal website at the time.