Liberace: Good Bye, Fare Well

Liberace: Good Bye, Fare Well

Ladies and Gentlemen, Libarace has left the building!

We did it! We finally ended the place setting madness! MiniMartha hooked me up with a 20% coupon for a Mikasa outlet store, and I went to town. The poor boy who asked if he could help me find anything got a run for his money.

“Yes, I’ve returned 6 sets of dishes because they were all warped. I need everyday dishes for 6 and china for 12. I’ll pay the money, but I need to make sure they’re not warped!”

Three-and-a-half hours. I spent three-and-a-half hours opening and inspecting every piece in three 92 piece china sets, and three 30 piece sets. That’s 366 dishes people! I felt like Emily Gilmore! Let this be a warning to anyone considering setting up house!! The store manager had 3 sales associates on their knees repacking the dishes I unpacked!

I had to get a referral to the store from a friend’s mom, because, let’s face it: What do I know about buying housewares?? This Mikasa store happens to be in the town were I grew up. It’s been there since I was 17 years old, and I’ve walked past it many times without the slightest interest in looking in the window.

“Bah! Crystal, I don’t like crystal!” I honestly couldn’t tell you what was in the store, because I had never looked. While the sales people were running around doing my bidding, I had some time to browse for the first time.

Marriage really gives you a new set of eyes. Suddenly, I’m justifying a 3-tier desert server because we have a Really Tiny apartment with a matching Really Tiny dining room table. And those ugly lead crystal water goblets from Auntie? I drop them in the sink all the time, and they never break! I really should buy 8 more! And why on earth would I pour water into lead crystal goblets with a plastic water pitcher? Hey! The glass snowflake ornaments are only $5 (and our Christmas tree theme is snowflakes)!!

Hubby got a phone call from the store: “Honey, will you let me back in the house tonight if i swear that I’ll never buy another dish again?”

Six Sets of Returned Dishes: $0.
Three tanks of gas driving to retail stores: $150.
Calling stores to see if they have this set and that set: $4.
Not having to listen to your wife whine about warped dishes: Priceless.